The Village Chat Part 11&12: A Dirty Little Town

Posted by Stephanie on November 20, 2015


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*Side note, this post is not late, last week only one episode played and now their schedule through the end will be a little wonky. *

And Low, we be-ist a mere 4 episodes from the finish-ith of this drama. What say we? Pleased or displeased? (Or methinks perhaps just a little bored?)

Jacqueline: Do you ever sit through drama episodes and feel like EVERYTHING happened while simultaneously jack-all happened? Because that’s a thing my brain just did. I think this round was a major snooze fest for you, but I’m more mixed. Episodes 11 and 12 seemed to be super focused on internal conflicts over external ones, which presses my happy button. We got “Crazy High School Chick is a rape-baby, “Mr. Woodworker is likely the serial killer/baby-maker-raper,” and “dead-sis is totes serial killer’s kid AND crazy artist’s sis.” But, like, didn’t you and I pretty much already sleuth most of that out by now?

Stephanie: I agree. While these episodes weren’t exactly boring, they weren’t the rollercoaster weirdo funtime we’ve been led to expect these last few weeks. I’ve come away from the episode with a bit of a ho-hum attitude. Of course, this may have been brought on by my irritation at the author for the dumb moves she had some characters make this time around–for example the kids leaving the time capsule evidence they broke into the Pharmacist’s house to get right where they found it and the Crazy high schooler leaving the (what is he, a woodworker?) artist possible rapist/murderer’s house only to collapse on right back on the ground. These are small minor things, but I’ve come to expect more from the writer.

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Jacqueline: I feel like the sense of urgency and tension is staying true for these episodes, with thankfully that saggy pacing from the early not zombie-ing itself with a reappearance. That said, this show SO doesn’t need 16 episodes because I feel like we’re THIS close to getting all our shiznit wrapped up in a pretty Murder Death Kill bow, but noooo. We gotta drag this cotillion out because TIMING. Case in point? STUPID KIDS BEING STOOOPID! I eye rolled so hard my balls popped out of their holes during the incompetent “kids being sucky quick-thinkers” scenes, but at LEAST they aren’t fully human yet. This whole, “Everybody is basically batshit cray-cray” nonsense from, like, ALL OF THE ADULT CHARACTERS is getting blah. Yeah, we’re getting cool ghost spooky stuff, but dammit adorable police puppy is getting left out in the cold!

Stephanie: You know what, I think that’s the thing. It’s not as if these episodes were bad, it’s just that it was so packed with exposition, like they needed to pack in all this dry stuff to get to the next area. Just confirming a lot of things we’d already worked out. In these episodes it was just like any other mystery show, when I’m used to this writer being just a little bit smarter than us. I did like the confirmation that the big birthmark question of last week wasn’t just a matter of the writer not knowing how birthmarks worked but the two girls having the same sort of mark was linked but part of a bigger whole. (So I guess the writers proved us wrong as in this case yes, yes, birthmarks can work that way.)

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Jacqueline: Exactly! I mean, I get it because the previous two episodes threw all the plot points and the kitchen sink at us, so maybe the writer wanted to pump the brakes a bit this go round. My main complaint, though? I think these two episodes were meh-tastic because I don’t really give a shite about any of these lead characters. They can all go make-out with a rotating helicopter blade for all I care…but the characters I DO go Care Bear over? They’re getting shafted in the ouch-place with little to no screentime. This drama’s biggest problem is that it has done very little in the way of making any strong emotional investment for the people it zeros-in on. (Hell, I can barely keep straight who is likely related to whom; dammit somebody track me down a family tree for this drama, please!) So while I do prefer internal conflict to external, when the show shifts its attention the innie-not-outie conflict stuff, I’m like, “Okay show, sure, uh-huh, gotcha, let’s wrap this up…NOW WHERE’S A DEAD BODY?!”

Stephanie: I am surprised with the lack of dead bodies–or dead bodies of people we know. I thought this show would have a higher body count.I do care for some people and surprisingly it’s not the people I would have thought –I care for the young daughter whose mother managed to get her locked in a mental hospital, the Pervy Art Teacher who has some sort of tragic past (we found out that his father is in fact the artist/possible rapist/possible murder) but underneath just seems like a sad guy, and most surprisingly, Dead Sister. I’m surprised that she has such a big part of the drama, and sad to see how more and more we see just how terrible her life was. Out of our giant cast of characters, these were not the ones I thought I’d latch onto.

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Jacqueline: YOU SAID THE WORDS! The characters I actually DO get feels for are left with none of the attention, or given the smallest increments of screen time possible. Hell, I feel like this show is almost exclusively the crazy-sisters’ at this point. We’ve seen not hide nor hare of Pervy Art Teacher in forever and a day (because those brief few scenes he’s been in? Totes don’t count.) And then there’s the poor Problem Child girl, who is such a victim because she lacks any agency at all in the story. So despite my feeling affection and sympathy towards her, I can’t maintain an emotional connection to that character. And then there’s dead sister who is…well…DEAD. I will say episodes 11 and 12 have given more time to Walnut Guy, who is actually the only character who I feel any affinity for on a consistent basis…even though the drama STILL wants us to think he’s the killer. But seriously, what was up with that injection/make-the-dead-body-smile thing from him?!

Stephanie: Well, that I have no idea. This show wants soooooo hard for us to think it’s Walnut Guy but if I know anything in this big dumb drama, it’s the fact that they are trying to make us eat red herring on him. He is not the killer, I proclaim that here and now! I think he’s just odd. And lonely. I would also like to say bad move Artist (who is becoming more and more crazy with each passing episode) on her pointing her finger at the son for being too close to her rather than the other way around–and then trying to send him away too–in this entire freaking drama, he is the one person who was completely on her side no matter what evidence to her evil doing were tossed in his face.


Jacqueline: DUUUDE. Ain’t that about sixteen degrees of accuracy. Seriously, if Crazy Artist Bitch Face doesn’t get shanked in the face with a spork by the end of episode 16, I’m complaining to my Congressman. I’m just SO TIRED of seeing shitty people being shitty. I want the son and Pervy Art Teacher and Walnut Man and kid and heroine to all just go stomp on that whole family until they stop being evil. Wait, are we absolutely SURE that Crazy Artist isn’t gestating Rosemary’s demon spawn? I mean, ever since she went needs-a-baby-with-a-penis obsessed, she’s been the golden ticket holder on the crazy train. Someone make her AND her crappy Pharmacist sister stop. Although yay for Pervy Art Teacher being like, “Bitch no I ain’t fleeing the country with you after you sell the two schools out from under the village.” That made me happy.

Stephanie: Ugh. I think they are going to try and make her out to be a sad figure in the end–because I really do think she was the one who gave birth to the Dead Sister and not the mother–which means she was probably raped by the rapist/murderer. So I guess that writes the Politician off as being the rapist/murderer, right? Because then why would he marry her? If she had blackmailed him she would have more power in the relationship. Is he covering up for the big politician? Or whoever that big mucky-muck was? I think there is still lots of information we’re missing out on–or are just not seeing yet.

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Jacqueline: Every single time I get something new figured out, I forget the last mystery I was trying to solve, like my brain is a turtle and this show is calculus.

Stephanie: HAHAHAHA Dude. It is math! I feel like if we chart it out on paper and pencil, we would be able to figure out who the killer is, or at least how they are all related–you know one of those math games that were like: If Suzy dated Jim Bob, and Susan and Jim arrived at the party before Bob and after Susan, who is Suzy dating now? Except ours would be all about rape, murder, and possible incest. What a dirty little town…

Jacqueline: DAMMIT DRAMA DON’T MAKE ME DO MATH! Math is evil. And rape, rape is evil too. And murder. And incest. Basically what I’m saying is this drama is dark and evil.

Stephanie: As evil as the artist?

Jacqueline: Dude. Lucifer and Pol Pot took Evil Lessons from her in hell-class; NOTHING is as evil as that she-bitch.

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Stephanie: Would you kill me if I said one more thing? I love how the fired policeman is continuing on with the case–and how the Puppy Policeman is making friends with the detective. I think that guy is surprised with how tenacious he is! I actually joked with you that it would be funny if it ended up being the detective who done everything wrong. I’m thinking they are not connected–the rapist/murderer and the murderer of Dead Sister, Although if she was out actively hunting him–who knows? Done. Promise 🙂

Jacqueline: Dammit. I think my brain just imploded.


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